It is my joy to sit and share my words with you–to share my stories and ultimately to ShareHispeace.
I have spent so much of my life as a codependent person. I have wanted to be approved of and validated. I long to be liked and accepted. I want to help those I love (to a fault) and all too often, I put them on pedestals, all in an effort to make myself feel better. This faulty belief system of who I am and how I see others and, of course, how I can influence how they see me, can take me down a slippery slope that leads me so far from God and His truth that I am wandering around aimlessly, lost in no time at all. Here, my soul finds NO rest.
Because I am prone to divert back to this place, back to seeking the approval of man, I can often leave this place of rest.
Just as my body has a place to go and rest at the end of the day (and as Stephanie mentioned various times throughout the day), so much more so my soul needs rest. And a place to find rest. A hiding place where it meets with God to be nourished and sustained. Strengthened. Validated. Approved.
Back in July, I mentioned to you, my closest confidants, that God had rescued me from my prison cell. The bars were forged with shame and a food obsession that held me prisoner for years.
During that sweet season of life, God’s reckless love pursued me in a new way. I was able to see that I had known God, but I didn’t always believe Him. I recognized that I knew things about Him, but I hid so much of myself from Him because of my shame. When I was able to step out of the shame, I was able to let His light shine into my life in a new way. Consequently, I was able to learn new things and believe new things. God’s light brings new growth into our lives, Amen?
So, I will just go back to that last post and put emphasis on a point that I feel needs some reflecting on. They are not my words, and although they aren’t Jennene Menzie Eklund’s words either, it was in Jennene’s book Overthrow that I read them by the grace of God. The words describe a way that I was not embracing. In fact, it was the polar opposite in my life. Pierre Teilhard de Chardin said, “We are not human beings having a spiritual experience. We are spiritual beings having a human experience.”
My soul is a part of me. It is a vital part of me as I live with eternity in my heart. I long to do what is right and what will please God first, but without the right nourishment my soul becomes deflated and my flesh becomes inflated. I feed my flesh and it grows. I begin to long to satisfy its primal needs and I am dulled to the cry in my soul to connect with and be sustained by it’s Maker.
My flesh will lie to me and do whatever it takes to undo the work of my soul and it’s creator. It does not want to be put to death, and so daily it creates distractions and pulls me back to the arena where it can have its way.
Sin lies east of Eden, outside the presence of God. Here we are restless wanderers, thirsting and hungry yet never satisfied. Psalm 107:10-11 says we are prisoners suffering in iron chains because we rebelled against God’s commands.
Our sin starts as a lack of trust (resting in God) and as a lack of satisfaction in what He has given us (see the Genesis account of sin entering the garden). As restless wanderers, there is a way out, a way back.
Seek a quiet place and time to get before God. Wait on God. Learn to listen to His voice instead of demanding He listen to yours. Remember God’s goodness.
I want to encourage you, if you aren’t following Jesus, If you aren’t using the instruction manual provided to you for your own good, today’s a new day. Today’s THE day. Stop putting IT off!
Stop looking at this brief and fleeting moment and see eternity. Recognize that God is your Father and He longs to draw near to you. Vanessa reminded us in her post about Freedom that real freedom will require surrendering my imperfect desires for His perfect desires sometimes. Freedom is a place of rest from the troubles of this world because Jesus has overcome the world.
Freedom = Rest = Trust
Please Join me back here on Friday as I convey to you once again how God, who is rich in mercy, is always faithful!!!